The Slippery Spirit

I have to face the fact that I'm a mutt, as I think many Americans are. I don't call myself "European American" or "German American" or any of the numerous countries that are in my family history. Frankly, my recent genealogical research has revealed so many cultural origins that I really can't lay claim to any of them. By percentage, I'm probably more German than anything else. And yet there is some part of me that doesn't feel appropriate when I try to immerse myself in the Asatru religious variants. Something just didn't feel like it clicked, probably because I've never even visited Germany.  I felt the same thing when I studied British traditional witchcraft. The names sounded foreign and there was a cultural flavor that felt slightly foreign. So, do I call myself a witch, a druid, a shaman, a hoodoo, or do I just not bother with labels and worry about doing my own thing? Recently, as I was considering the state of my being on thi...

I often find repetitive physical work to be a kind of meditation. So I wanted to share with you a sacred moment I had recently. The trees near me are finally done dropping their leaves, which means I couldn't continue to put off the raking of the yard. I told myself I would wait until all the leaves were down. Now the work needed to get done if I wanted any kind of lawn in the spring, and I had to do it before all the plants under those leaves died. Since this is a job that I do only once every year, I decided to make it into a simple little sacred moment. My Ritual: I smudged my rake saying, "May this tool become an extension of my hand and follow the directions of my desire." (This is my stock request when purifying a tool that isn't one of my usual ritual tools.) I smudged myself saying, "May this work bring strength to my body, focus to my mind, and peace to my spirit." That's all it took. I then spent half the day raking leaves. I spent tim...

Most of the projects that I do with my hands help me to deepen my connection to the spiritual forces around me. I am lucky because every moment of my life has the feeling that the sacred is present. When I am involved in craftsmanship, that feeling is amplified tenfold. One of the most important activities in which a shaman can engage is establishing and deepening one's connection to Nature and their environment. I won't explore the details of why at the risk of sounding like a know-it-all. But I think it's safe to say that a shaman isn't a shaman if he doesn't know and have a good working relationship with the spirits of his environment. This week's entry at my craft blog, Craft Harder , is about trees, plants and deepening my connection to my environment. If you are interested, you can read it here.

I spend most of my waking hours in a state of half-asleep. Though I'm conscious, I'm not quite alert. There was a time when I was alert at all time during waking hours, but that was several decades ago when I was in school. All the worries of an adult life were handled, I lived alone without a partner (or the desire to have one), and I had all the friends who understood me that I could want. Basically, I wanted for nothing and worried about no part of life. I kept a very regular sleep schedule consisting of exactly 8 hours of sleep at the same hours of the night and I took a 30 minute nap after eating my lunch every day. My sleeping periods were deep and restorative. When I was not asleep, I was awake and alert like no one else around me. During that time, lucid dreams occurred every day, my memory was impeccable, and my immune system was impenetrable too. Today's shamanship practice was more a matter of fighting to stay awake. Most of my practice is like that...

Recently, I went along with Casey so he could meet a local pagan gentleman who wanted to seek some guidance. Casey offered to meet with him and answer whatever questions he was able. I went along with the prospects of meeting a nice person who wasn't a total flake. Tim turned out to be a godsend. Tim is in the same place I am. He is a long-term solitary student and is doubtful if solitary is right for him anymore. I've had that same feeling for a while, but it has been very difficult for me to come to terms with the idea that I may have to accept the bullshit of group work. I have an uber-low tolerance for bullshit and I hate being invalidated by someone who thinks they know more than me. It sounded like Tim had the same issues. As I listened, much of what Tim said rang true for me. It was clear that it was time for me to get out of my own way and start some regular practice. For too long I have been functioning on the fringe of my spiritual path. I have learned a great dea...

after my last journey attempt, i decided to get a little more comfortable. i wanted my body to be free of the usual things that pester it: cold feet, a bump in my back, worry that someone will walk in and spoil my moment. so i decided that trial two of shamanic journeying would be done in my bed. it's nice and warm, soft, soothing -- just what my body needs to be no distraction for my mind. i collected my tools again, and began as i had before. this time i was far too relaxed. my mind was so soothed by my relaxed body that i went right to sleep. obviously, some middle ground is what i need. i have to make a space that is comfortable, but not so soothing that i just want to snooze. i've also come to realize that one can't just do a journey without mental preparation. prior to doing it, i have to talk to my mind. i have to tell it that it CAN do this thing. i have to prepare it for staying alert during this experience. i have to make this experience different in my mind from ...

i have a drumming CD so today i tried to do a shamanic journey with it. i got my supplies: a pillow, eye covering, ipod, earphones, privacy, and tried my first shamanic journey (since my recent relaxation exercises). the first thing i noticed is that absolute comfort is essential, because when you are as conscious as i am, every little complaint brings me back into full wakefulness. laying on the floor on my back was painful unless i elevated my legs. the next time, i will just do it in my bed and maybe even while laying on my side. that's the most comfortable sleep position for me, so it may work for this too. my blindfold was a fleece headband used for skiers. it also help to keep my earphones in place. the earphones that i used had those little sleeves to go inside the ear canal. this helped to exclude any street noise outside my house that i couldn't control. i also had to put on a sweater and heavy socks to keep my feet warm. i did my best to just relax. at first i just la...